Intro
The episode begins with a parody of Tales From The Crypt with Diesel as The Crypt Keeper.The scene begins in a dungeon room where a crypt opens and aftier several waves of rats, snakes, spiders and rabbits crawl out of it, the CrpytKeeper sits up in it. He proclaims himself to be the master of scare- amonies much to the delight of the zombie Splatter. A bound Sir Handel interrupts in protest and is killed in an iron maiden, his blood spilling out onto the floor and spelling out Steamhouse Of Horror XVII Sir Handel himself takes delight in this and proclaims "A HO HO MY BLOOD IS A GENIUS FANCY ROMAN NUMERLAS AND EVERYTHING!"
Artwork of the story by NedGrabiec
"Married to the Large Engine"[]
As Thomas and Emily snuggle on the hammock, a meteorite falls nearby, burning off the top of Emily's funnel in the process. Cracking open, it reveals a green goo resembling a melted marshmallow. Despite his family's objections, Thomas puts it on a stick and eats it (although the goo tries many times to get away and is clearly alive). That night,after saying "Must eat, then poop, then eat some more, then eat while pooping", his hunger, Thomas eats all the food in the house. He also eats the cat and attempts to eat James but is stopped by Emily. After that, he finds engines having a bbq sauce fight, then sees one who fell into the fire, and eats that teen. Then he ends up at the Oktoberfest. He eats BoCo and 3 other diesels then says "must eat more engines, thank god I'm in the UK". Now seriosly big, he walks around, looking for food. Now a king size engine, rampaging through the streets of Sodor, eating all the engines he can find. As Thomas samples bus passengers as if they were candies, Dr. Phil McGrawl shows up with Emily, James, Rosie and Lady. He tells Thomas to stop for their sakes. But, Thomas doesn't listen to him and eats Dr. Phil (his last words "Food does not equal love!"). Thomas then ends his rampaging for fear of losing Emily and vows to use his insatiable appetite for more constructive purposes. Later, Spencer dedicates a new homeless shelter. The homeless engines enter the shelter, only to be eaten by Thomas.
You Gotta Know When to Golem[]
At the end of an episode of Cranky's show, James goes backstage to complain about an acid-spraying Cranky brand alarm clock. There he finds the Golem of Prague, a creature from Jewish mythology. Cranky tells James that in the seventeenth century, the Golem was sculpted out of clay by a powerful rabbi. The Golem would do anything written on a scroll and placed in his mouth. He had been passed down through many generations and now works for Cranky. James steals the Golem by writing a command for him to come to his home at midnight, while Cranky is wearing a mask in preparation for a "Desperate Houseflies" sketch. At midnight, the Golem shows up at Thomas, Emily, James, Rosie and Lady's house. From then on, James uses him to carry out his commands: swinging The Fat Controller up and down like a yo-yo until he splits in half and kicking Thomas in the buffers (though he at first thought James wrote walls). Rosie thinks the Golem doesn't like doing the biddings of others and feeds him a scroll reading "Speak". The Golem (voiced by Richard Lewis) reveals that he feels guilty about being used to commit heinous acts. To make him feel better, James and family create a female Golem out of Play-Doh. When Thomas hears her voice (Fran Drescher) he tries to chop her up with an axe, but the Golem stops him, saying that she is perfect. The two are married by Rabbi Hyman Krustofsky and the female Golem convinces Oliver not to press charges with the promise of pan-fried latkes, a Jewish delicacy.
"The Day The Earth Looked Stupid"[]
The population of Sodor, circa 1938 (during the Great Depression), are fooled by Orson Welles' infamous The War of the Worlds radio broadcast and believe the world has been invaded. A mass panic breaks out, and the citizens begin rioting and destroy the town. Emily suggests they foil the aliens by cavorting in the mud naked like animals. So they do this all day until the next day, Rosie notifies the citizens that it was all a hoax and, angry at being fooled, the citizens of Sodor vow to not fall for such a trick again. Kang and Kodos decide this is the perfect time for a real invasion, and begin destroying what's left of the town. True to their word, the town does not believe that it's a real invasion and ignores it, although Orson Welles (Maurice LaMarche) comes to Springfield, admits it is not a staged act, and begs them to do something. Unfortunately, they don't, and the segment ends three years later with Kang and Kodos looking over the ruins, mulling on what went wrong and why they weren't greeted as liberators as they rid Earth's weapons of mass disintegration (WMD) during "Operation Enduring Occupation", a parody of the real military operation, "Operation Enduring Freedom". The camera then pans out to reveal the earth has fallen victim to a nuclear fallout. As the credits start to roll, "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire" by The Inkspots plays. The song during the opening title credits is ""Gloomy Sunday"" by Billie Holiday